So you would question; so why aren’t you passionate? What are you passionate about?
I wish I can answer these questions with great certainty, if I could then I wouldn’t be here writing about it. I had an epiphany yesterday from attending a networking conference as well as a workshop. There was this one activity which is still very vivid in my memory. It was like a motivational therapy that emphasized on self reflection. Sounds like a pile of crap? I agreed at first, when I was asked to close my eyes and listen to the verbal instruction. I can’t help but started to giggle, I tried SO hard not to burst out laughing. Its just I wasn’t quite ready for the cheesy music and script, I was very skeptical and questioned why I came here.
The exercise required participants to fully cooperate in order to function properly, so I gave my best and started to let myself fully into this. It took me on a journey, From recalling our successes to failures, seeking the reasons behind and understanding without any influences.
The most memorable moment came upon me when I had to imagine myself pushing a door and seeing my future self standing there. Telling me what’s “his” regrets are and advises that the “current” self should know. I had a moment of confusion, because I knew this was just a matter of creating an identity which I believed will be my future desire. But deep-down there were 2 things that kept recurring – Happiness and No Regrets.
So that brought up many things that I started to question about, such as my passion. I have lost who I am in the recent years, bits by bits. Why is that? I pictured myself as the future self and I saw someone who’s putting others before him, doing things he sometimes doesn’t prefer to do or even the FEAR that stops him from doing what’s on his mind. This has to stop. That’s the epiphany, the light bulb that went alight.
It’s easy to blame it on others and things, surroundings and such external factors. Yes to some degree it has effects but Its really me that can really change what’s wrong. And if I keep fading then obviously I needed to do something about it. Express yourself, I think that’s a great first step to regain your passion. Just do the damn thing that’s on your mind and think about it later.